Looking at the point behind another quote image, and I think it’s allowed…
Give Yourself Permission.
Ah, the permission.
So many of us, too many of us, spend so much time, too much time, seeking permission – permission from others.
It holds us back from doing the things we want, definitely saying the things we want, from even thinking some of the things we want, and unquestionably it holds us back from being ourselves.
If that’s such a problem then, which clearly I believe it is, why is it the case, and what can we do about it?
To start a discussion about ‘permission’, we need to go right back in time, to when we were born in fact! We are all born reliant on other people, our parents in the normal course of events.
We depend on them to feed us, to clothe us, to keep us safe, and this is where the permission starts to creep in..
As we develop, the people that are focused on keeping us safe start to tell us what we can’t do. These are things we can’t do because they are dangerous, and it’s perfectly natural and understandable for people to tell us these things.
It’s a balancing act though, because while there are some things that we clearly need to be told we can’t do, because doing them will cause us immediate danger, possibly fatal, there are other things that we might be better off finding out ourselves.
Things that might hurt, either mentally or physically, but might *not*! Things that if we found out ourselves and tested, might have a different outcome to the outcome imagined by those trying to protect us.
This is a key point.
Some people end up being wrapped up in cotton wool, so much so that they just don’t know how to investigate things for themselves, how to push boundaries, how to test limits.
For all of us though, our brain is taught from this early age that permission is given or refused by others. We take that belief with us, and while some of us question this, investigate and push it, some of us don’t, if we were the cotton wool bunch.
It means we can end up living a life directed by others. Our lifestyle, our careers, our health, our relationships, can all be lived out as a direct result of permission from others.
Now, there’s nothing wrong with that ‘per se’ – some people live quite happily in this groove, maybe not even knowing it, and if that works for everyone, then that’s all well and good!
Of course, there are people who don’t live directed by others. These were the ones who were taught that they could think for themselves, that they could try things, some would work and some wouldn’t, but that they could try.
There’s a third group though, and it’s *this* group that my point is directed towards. It’s a group I can relate to well, as it’s a group I was in myself…
It’s the group that have been living directed by others, but come to realise it – they can see the group that are more free with their thinking, and wonder how they can move over to that group.
The key is in the quote I use in the image.
Give yourself permission.
Give yourself permission to do thing, to say things, to think things. Instead of waiting for, or seeking the permission of others, give it yourself to yourself.
Your lifestyle, your opinions, your career, your health, your friends, if you want to try something, try it! You might succeed, you might fail, but it’s your decision.
Now, I understand that this is not always easy. Once we move past the age of being a baby that needs the permission of others to keep us safe, there are those that would seek to maintain the position of being someone who gives us permission.
That’s so we live in a life that suits them, that fits in with their ideas, their agenda.
They will not like it when we take that power of permission away from them. They will try to reassert that permission, and it may well lead to real and difficult challenges that have to be dealt with.
That’s ok. It’s not nice, but these things can be inevitable if we are instigating a process of change. I doesn’t always run smoothly, and it would be a disservice to suggest otherwise.
Of course, it doesn’t always have to be rocky. Sometimes the process can go far more easily than you had imagined, in which case great!
Either way though, the choice is yours. It always has been. This permission you seek to give yourself, it’s always been yours to give – you either didn’t know it, or have been held back by wariness of consequence.
So, look to your circumstances. Look to your lifestyle, your career, your health, your passions.
Have you been living according to someone else’s decisions? Your friends, your family, your work colleagues, ‘society’ maybe?
If you think it’s time to make some changes, to get more aligned with what *you* want to do, with the real, authentic you, then go ahead. See what happens, and simply give yourself permission.
Try it, it can change your life, it can transform it.
Ok, I’d love to hear what you think – do leave a comment!
‘Til Next Time,
Health & happiness,
P.S. If you feel you’d like a hand moving forwards, watch my free video series covering my 8 step goal achievement formula. I’ve used it for decades, it works!