If You’re Worried What’s Round The Corner, Get Round There And Find Out!

"Halnaker", "Gordon Bryan",
Written by gordino

I’m looking at another of my quote images, and it might be a case of smoothing the corners…

I took that picture of a lovely tree tunnel. I had seen pictures of the tree tunnel before, and when I found out where it was, I took the 2 hours odd drive to Halnaker in West Sussex, and got snapping!

When I started to make my quote images, the idea of wondering was at the end of any tunnel seemed to work for me, so I’ve used it as a starting point to look at fear of moving forwards…

There are many fears that stop people moving forwards, and the fear of change is right up there on the list!

Change is inevitable if we set out on the path of self improvement, personal development and goal achievement. That may seem obvious, because in order for results to change, the actions have to change, and in order for actions to change, attitude has to change.

That’s a lot of change, and it scares the living daylights out of a lot of people!

It’s so scary, because the changes will move life away from the present circumstances which we are used to, towards a life which we cannot predict. Yes, we can make educated guesses, and we may be fairly sure about the changes, but it could be argued that we can’t be *sure*.

Of course some personal development or goal achievement moves will involve changes that might be real leaps in the dark, that we genuinely don’t know what will happen.

It might be a change in our circle of friends, or how family views us. It might mean a job change, or change in living arrangements. It might mean moving to a completely new area, or another country!

It might a change in lifestyle habits, or a change from the safety net of a regular pay check to the uncertain world of self employment.

It could be it’s the change in ‘ourselves’ that the progress would bring that scares us the most.

So, having covered all the possible changes, and accepting that the unknown can be scary, it’s no surprise that it stops people moving forwards at all, right?

Well, no, it’s no surprise, but sometimes it’s used as an *excuse*, and it doesn’t have to be that way.

There are ways of dealing with the fear of change, and here’s something else that isn’t a surprise, I’ve going to cover 2 of them..!

Firstly, since fear of possible change is just that, fear of *possible* change, it might be helped by simply looking at it in a different way – that it might not be as bad as you think!

If we think back to how many times in our life we have said ‘oh, that wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be,’ it will be a *lot* of times! Fears over the future simply turn out to be not as bad as we thought, more often than not. I’m not saying there will never be changes that we don’t like, but we just don’t need to let the fear of it hold us back.

It’s wasted energy, and it’s misplaced energy.

The second way I like to view the fear of change is to view it as *opportunity* of change instead!

Remember, the particular fears I’m talking about come about when we look at personal development, at setting goals. The whole point of us going through that process is to bring our lives more back in line with our passions, our joys, our soul.

If that’s the case, then the changes around the corner should be looked forward to rather than feared, because it means we are on the road to the more fulfilling life for ourself – yes, it will be a change, but it will be a *good* change!

We can take the attitude of ‘oh, I wonder what it will look like?’ with excitement rather than trepidation, because if we are directing the change, and we find we don’t like it, we can change it again!

That’s the key – if we let fear of change keep us stuck where we are, then we will still get buffeted by the circumstances life throws at us. That’s just the way it is, and sometimes it’s not always pleasant, so instead of that why *not* choose to be in control, to set changes in progress that *we* want, that we have decided on and acted towards.

It’s a much better way to look at it, in my view.

"Halnaker", "Gordon Bryan",

So, look to your own tree tunnel in life, the journey along the way can be soaked up and enjoyed, and if you’re worried because you’re not sure what’s around the corner – it might not be anywhere near as bad as you think. I’ve said it before, and I’ll finish by saying it again, get round there and find out!

Ok, I’d love to know what you think – do leave a comment!

‘Til Next Time,
Health & Happiness,
Gordon
P.S. If you’d like to find out more about moving forwards, don’t forget to grab my free 8 step goal achievement formula!



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8 Comments

  • As the US President Kennedy once said, “In the Chinese language, the word “crisis” is composed of two characters,
    one representing danger and the other, opportunity.”

    Take the leap and find out! Look around that corner!

    Thanks for sharing!
    Paul.

  • Hi Gordon,

    It’s not new, but it’s said that FEAR can be False Expectations Appearing Real.

    I prefer to think of Change, which as you say is inevitable, as ChaLLEnge leading to opportunity.

    Here in the UK 48% of the population (and probably a few more if they’re honest, are fearing the changes that will come after Brexit is implemented. Let’s instead focus on the new opportunities opening to us.

    Great, forward looking, post.

    Joy – Blogging After Dark

    • Hi Joy,
      Oh yes, False Expectations Appearing Real is something that holds so many back.
      Your Brexit example is a good one – if the news says it all the time, if the Chancellor says it all the time, even if the news includes the good news parts hidden away, then so many people take that fear as their starting position when it comes to perspective, instead of the possible positvies – nice angle!
      Cheers,
      Gordon

  • This is so true! Case in point today…

    3 days ago I really hurt my ankle bad at basketball. I start freaking out cos i’ve got my 2 young boys to look after.

    I worry myself into anger only to find out its just a severe sprain. I was initially told likely fracture.

    Come the night of me getting my kids I got thru the night without too many problems! In fact it was a great night 🙂

    Worrying is simply a waste of time! Thanks for reminding us all.

    • Hi Sam
      Glad to hear the ankle wasn’t too bad.
      You are right, the worry is a waste of time (and energy too!)
      Easily done though, which is why it helps to remind ourselves to think differently about it.
      Cheers,
      Gordon

  • Hi Gordon,

    Another wonderful read my man.

    What an amazingly timely post for me and my family mate.

    Just today I was talking with our 2 teenage daughters about “fear” and “expectations.”

    The girls had never really thought about this critical aspect of their lives and more than likely because of the huge impact social media is having on their relationships.

    They both had a fear of change EXCEPT when it came to being online.

    For some strange reason the girls could and have easily handled lots of changes in their “online life” but could in no way do the same in what I’m calling their “real life” – I know I’m showing my age with that comment!

    I just had them read this post and after I finish my comment for you we’re going to have another “deep and meaningful” chat.

    Many thanks for sharing your experience and expertise Gordon – very much appreciated mate.

    Best wishes from the remote Thai village blogger

    Peter

    • Hi Peter,
      Thanks for your kind words!
      That’s fascinating, but not too surprising I guess, to hear that change is easier to accept in the online world but seems so much more fearful in the ‘real’ world.
      So many times, more often than not actually, our fears in the real world turn out to never be as bad as we thought, and that can be confirmed by simply getting round the corner and finding out!
      Thanks for stopping by as ever, hope all well with you,
      Cheers,
      Gordon