The point I’m looking at in this article is a vast point, maybe as vast as the universe…
“You can’t control the universe. You really can’t. Stop trying.”
I took that picture September 2015, of the Super Red Blood Moon, in the middle of the night (unsurprisingly!)
It’s not the best moon picture ever taken, not by a long way, but it was nice to capture such a rare event, and against the backdrop of the blackness of space, it drove home for me the point about the sheer scale of the universe, our place in it, and ideas about trying to control everything in it!
Scale – immense. Our place in it – minuscule. Attempts to control it all – futile.
That just about sums it up, but let’s take a closer look, because I think it’s a key way to increase contentment in our lives, a key point in the personal development journey.
The moon that night looked ‘Super’ large, because it was closer to our planet, which is of course many times bigger than the moon. The Earth is a small plant in the solar system, and the sun we orbit is tiny in the scale of the galaxy. The galaxy itself is tiny in the scale of the universe, and the subject of how many universes there might be? Well, that’s for a different article!
Suffice to say, that in the big scheme of things astronomy wise, we are small.
When we look at those size comparisons, it would seem ludicrous to any sensible person to consider that they could control it all – wouldn’t it?
Well, of course it would! We do think we can though, don’t we, I know I’ve tried! *Why* do we do it though, and what can we do about it?
We do it, because when we try to control the universe, we’re not trying to control the vast sizes I’ve covered, but we’re trying to control *our* universe – the one that has *us* at the centre of it. All the things that happen to us in that universe, all the people that come in and out of that universe, *that’s* what we’re trying to control!
There’s a problem though – it can’t be done!
We may think that we are fully in control, sitting at some kind of console directing everything to go as we want it to. That may be done through bullying, it may be done through violence, it may be done through isolation, it may be done through any number of controlling ways, but it will only ever work to a certain extent.
At some point, the people who strive to control usually lose that control, because the acts of other people, the direction of circumstance goes against them, and it often ends badly.
Even if such people appear in control, all their energy is being consumed by the effort, and it leaves no space for passion, for joy, for the things that make us feel alive.
Pretty pointless then, wouldn’t you say?
It doesn’t have to be like that…
A better way, is to accept that you can’t control the universe, and stop trying.
That can be a hard adjustment to make, but it can be one of the most rewarding if taken on.
Releasing the need to control might brings things into play that we might not have chosen, it might bring interactions with other people or results that we would definitely *not* have chosen, but nevertheless it’s an extremely worthwhile things to do.
The release of need to control, allows spontaneity back into our life, it allows new opportunities to flow our way, it allows the unexpected room to breathe, and it’s here that we can get some of the most cherished and joyous moments in life.
So, am I saying that we should not try to control anything, that we should take our hands off the wheel of our life and let circumstance buffet us whichever way it will?
Oh no, I’m not saying that. No, no, no, I’m not saying that at *all*!
We should be exercising control in many areas of life, for example health, career, relationships, wealth, lifestyle, but the control should be about *our* actions, *our* choices, *our* results, not about controlling the actions of others.
Wanting ‘life’ to react in a certain way is not a bad thing per se, and we can put steps in place to try and get the results, but we *must* accept that we simply can’t control it all.
Sometimes thing will go wrong. Sometimes people will let us down. Whether we like it or not, sometimes it will happen. When it does go wrong, then once again it’s up to use to control our reactions.
Can you see the difference between controlling ourselves, our thoughts and our actions, and trying to control everything and everyone around us?
I think it’s a huge point on the self improvement and personal development journey, and the benefits of taking it on board are immense.
So, look to your universe, and compare it to *the* universe – are you trying to control the wrong one? If so, then you can’t do it. You really can’t. Stop trying!
As always, I’d love to hear what you think – do leave a comment!
‘Til Next Time,
Health & happiness,
P.S. If you’d like to find more about acting on what you *can* control, grab my free 8 Step Goal Achievement Formula!